Funny Quotes by Andy Borowitz

Andy Borowitz

Give a man a fish, and he will eat for a day. Give a man Twitter, and he will forget to eat and starve to death.

Funny

Men

Technology

Andy Borowitz

It would be nice to spend billions on schools and roads, but right now that money is desperately needed for political ads.

Funny

Money

Nice

Andy Borowitz

Maybe this is crazy, but I think the right to own a gun is trumped by the right not to be shot by one.

Crazy

Funny

Gun

Andy Borowitz

On July 4 we celebrate government of the people, by the people, and for the people, or as they are now called, corporations.

4th of July

Anniversary

Funny

Andy Borowitz

Sarah Palin has decided not to run for President and go straight to the quitting part.

Funny

Political

Running

Andy Borowitz

Thanks to the Internet, people we might have only suspected of being idiots can now give us ample evidence.

Funny

People

Technology

Andy Borowitz

Xmas Trivia: Before it became a major shopping holiday, Christmas is believed to have had a “religious” meaning.

Christmas

Funny

Religious

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Matt Groening

Evan S. Connell

Douglas Horton

Andy Warhol

Marv Dunphy

4th Of July

Action

Age

Anniversary

Believe

Birthday

Black

Bullets

Cain

Care

Celebrate

Christie

Christmas

Comedian

Country

Crazy

Cutting

Dog

Dreamer

Dumb

Earthquakes

Eight

Fake

Funny

Funny Christmas

Gay

Gps

Gun

Home

House

Hurricanes

Idiotic

Littles

Made

Mark

Men

Mom

Money

Needs

Nice

Oil

Pakistan

People

Political

Proposal

Race

Real

Religious

Republican

Return

Romney

Running

Said

Secret

Settling

Should Have

Sick

Slavery

Technology

Tests

Thinking

Trivia

Tvs

Two

Want

War

White

Wish

Years

Funny Quotes by Andy Borowitz

Give a man a fish, and he will eat for a day. Give a man Twitter, and he will forget to eat and starve to death.

It would be nice to spend billions on schools and roads, but right now that money is desperately needed for political ads.

Maybe this is crazy, but I think the right to own a gun is trumped by the right not to be shot by one.

On July 4 we celebrate government of the people, by the people, and for the people, or as they are now called, corporations.

Sarah Palin has decided not to run for President and go straight to the quitting part.

Thanks to the Internet, people we might have only suspected of being idiots can now give us ample evidence.

Xmas Trivia: Before it became a major shopping holiday, Christmas is believed to have had a “religious” meaning.

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Funny Quotes by

Matt Groening

Evan S. Connell

Douglas Horton

Andy Warhol

Marv Dunphy

Topics by Andy Borowitz

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