Quotes by Mary Pipher

Mary Pipher

Adolescence is a border between childhood and adulthood. Like all borders, it’s teeming with energy and fraught with danger.

Borders

Childhood

Energy

Adolescence is a time when children are supposed to move away from parents who are holding firm and protective behind them. When the parents disconnect, the children have no base to move away from or return to. They aren’t ready to face the world alone. With divorce, adolescents feel abandoned, and they are outraged at that abandonment. They are angry at both parents for letting them down. Often they feel that their parents broke the rules and so now they can too.

Children

Divorce

Moving

Adolescence is when girls experience social pressure to put aside their authentic selves and to display only a small portion of their gifts.

Girl

Pressure

Self

Adolescents are travelers, far from home with no native land, neither children nor adults. They are jet-setters who fly from one country to another with amazing speed. Sometimes they are four years old, an hour later they are twenty-five. They don’t really fit anywhere. There’s a yearning for place, a search for solid ground.

Children

Country

Home

Adolescents’ immature thinking makes it difficult for them to process the divorce. They tend to see things in black-and-white terms and have trouble putting events into perspective. They are absolute in their judgments and expect perfection in parents. They are likely to be self-conscious about their parent’s failures and critical of their every move. They have the expectations that parents will keep them safe and happy and are shocked by the broken covenant. Adolescents are unforgiving.

Black And White

Divorce

Moving

All feelings are acceptable, but all behavior isn’t.

Acceptable

Behavior

Feelings

All geniuses born women are lost to the public good.

Born

Genius

Lost

Coming out of the trance of denial is painful. But crises offer us opportunities to rethink our lives. The best thing about despair is that it wakes us up. We can see the world more clearly and open to new possibilities…And we can find new joy in the ordinary.

Despair

Joy

Opportunity

Courage has become Raiders of the Lost Ark, or riding in spaceships, killing people, taking enormous physical risks. To me, the kind of courage that’s really interesting is someone whose spouse has Alzheimer’s and yet manages to wake up every morning and be cheerful with that person and respectful of that person and find things to enjoy even though their day is very, very difficult. That kind of courage is really undervalued in our culture.

Alzheimer's

Courage

Morning

Girls developed eating disorders when our culture developed a standard of beauty that they couldn’t obtain by being healthy. When unnatural thinness became attractive, girls did unnatural things to be thin.

Anorexia

Girl

Healthy

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Acceptable

Adolescence

Air

Alive

Alzheimer's

America

Anorexia

Beautiful

Behavior

Being Yourself

Black And White

Blow

Book

Borders

Born

Boys

Care

Childhood

Children

Color

Country

Courage

Daughter

Despair

Divorce

Doe

Dream

Dull

Energy

Failing

Feelings

Feet

Fighting

Friendship

Fullness Of Life

Genius

Girl

Giving

Healthy

Heart

Hero

Home

Honesty

Identity

Immigration

Intelligent

Jobs

Joy

Keys

Kindness

The Future Blueprint

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The Home Therapist: Anti Anxiety

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The Autobiography

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The Behaviour Diary

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Quotes by Mary Pipher

Mary Pipher

Adolescence is a border between childhood and adulthood. Like all borders, it’s teeming with energy and fraught with danger.

Adolescence is when girls experience social pressure to put aside their authentic selves and to display only a small portion of their gifts.

All feelings are acceptable, but all behavior isn’t.

All geniuses born women are lost to the public good.

Coming out of the trance of denial is painful. But crises offer us opportunities to rethink our lives. The best thing about despair is that it wakes us up. We can see the world more clearly and open to new possibilities…And we can find new joy in the ordinary.

Girls developed eating disorders when our culture developed a standard of beauty that they couldn’t obtain by being healthy. When unnatural thinness became attractive, girls did unnatural things to be thin.

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Topics by Mary Pipher

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The Future Blueprint

The Home Therapist: Anti Anxiety

The Autobiography

The Behaviour Diary

The Dating Diary

The Relationship Therapist

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