Quotes by Julie Burchill

Julie Burchill

‘Stress’ was the catch-all every pamper-pedlar I spoke to used to explain why healthy women feel the need to be regularly patted, petted and preened into a state of babyish beatification.

Healthy

Needs

Stress

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A cynic should never marry an idealist. For the cynic, marriage represents the welcome end of romantic life, with all its agony and ecstasy. But for the idealist, it is only the beginning.

Agony

Cynicism

Welcome

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A good part – and definitely the most fun part – of being a feminist is about frightening men.

Fun

Independent

Men

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A wedding is a funeral which masquerades as a feast. And the greater the pageantry, the deeper the savagery.

Funeral

Masquerade

Pageantry

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A woman who looks like a girl and thinks like a man is the best sort, the most enjoyable to be and the most pleasurable to have and to hold.

Girl

Men

Thinking

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Amsterdam has more than 150 canals and 1,250 bridges, but it never seems crowded, nor bent and bitter from fleecing the tourist.

Amsterdam

Bridges

Tourists

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And call me a pig, but isn’t it brilliantly refreshing how early the Dutch eat dinner? When they’re still laying out the cutlery in achingly hip Barcelona, they’re hanging the Closed sign on the restaurant doors of old Amsterdam.

Dinner

Doors

Pigs

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As a child, I wanted only two things – to be left alone to read my library books, and to get away from my provincial hometown and go to London to be a writer. And I always knew that when I got there, I wanted to make loads of money.

Book

Children

Two

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As a kid, I grew to define what I didn’t want my life to be like by sitting behind moaning women on the bus, hearing them bang on about their aches and pains, both real and imagined.

Kids

Pain

Real

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As a precocious teen I dreamed of being Graham Greene. Well, as it turned out, I never wrote a great novel, sadly, and I never converted to Catholicism, happily, but I did do one thing he did. That is, in middle age I moved to a seaside town and got into a right barney with the local powers-that-be.

Age

Middle

Towns

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Abuse

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Ageing

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